Prepared To Love
by All The Umbrellas In London
Summary: Set just after Day 2 and the Game. As Kate and Jake are trying to get their relationship off the starting blocks, Jack begins to get cold feet, while remembering his past loves, Teri and Marilyn. One shot, open to more. Please review, my first fic.


_Authors Note: Just a little post Season 2 angst, Jack and Kate. Only really written because I love the character of Kate._

_Disclaimer: I don't own _24_, or Kate, or Jack, or John Beard, or FOX News, etc. Those things belong to the people they belong to. But not to me._

* * *

**PREPARED TO LOVE...**

* * *

Kate was quickly growing tired of John Beard. The FOX News anchor had been on TV all morning, reminding the nation of how her family, her father's company, had been involved in detonating that bomb. It didn't help that today was the day; the day Marie would be thrown in prison for the rest of her life.

It had been nine months since that horrifying, dreadful day, when the United States of America had been rocked to its foundations, though Kate knew much more about what had happened than the average citizen. She knew how close that bomb had been to going off in the middle of Los Angeles, she had seen first hand the atrocities committed by both sides of the struggle. But still, the rest of the nation knew only what the government, and what President Palmer, was willing to share with them.

They knew about the little boy in Georgia, and about the attempt on Palmer's life. They knew about the bomb, about her family's involvement, but they didn't know the toll the day had taken on the people who had almost sacrificed everything for the lives of the people of Los Angeles.

She knew.

She knew all to well.

She had seen Jack, following his showdown in the stadium with Peter Kingsley, and his horrific torture at the hands of Kingsley's men. But of course, nobody knew about Jack's suffering. And nobody would ever find out.

He had saved her life, not only then, but three months earlier, as well. She had been taken hostage, twice, during that day, had been trapped in a subway car, and Jack had followed her, had rescued her. And again, hours later, he had been rescued by Jack after being kidnapped by the German man known only as Max.

She knew this, too, was all about her family, this time her father, not her sister, who was rotting behind bars following her arrest by CTU.

Kate shook herself out of her reverie, focused instead on John Beard, reiterating, yet again, that the trial of Marie Warner would come to an end, as judgment was finally handed down. Kate sighed in frustration, glancing down at her half-finished cereal.

"Hey," came the husky voice of the man who had shared her bed the night before.

Kate looked up, and smiled warmly, genuinely. "Hey, Jack."

The handsome blonde man returned her smile, but Kate still saw that hint of tired pain in his eyes. She had seen it the first time she had met him. She had learned later that it had been because of the death of his wife. She had been hurt, knowing that she would always be playing second fiddle to a memory, but she had understood. After all, they had been together for a long time, had raised Kim together, had been through a lot. He was fully dressed, though he hadn't showered. Obviously, he was going to go home for that.

"Good sleep?" she asked, as he kissed her gently, tenderly, on the forehead.

"Yeah…" he said with a smile, helping himself to some cereal.

"Do you need to go in to work today?"

Jack cast her a sidelong glance. He could tell that she was avoiding talking about Marie, and she knew that he would have rather talked about anything else than his work, except perhaps his family. "No," he answered. "Tony will have it covered."

"Fair enough." Kate nodded, and took a sip of her orange juice.

"Are you going into the city today?" Jack asked her, obviously referring to Marie's sentencing.

"No." Kate shook her head, finishing the last of her cereal. "What are you doing today?"

"I was going to lunch with an old friend from the LAPD."

Kate smiled, but her stomach clenched with guilt. Or was it guilt? She hated Marie, she hated what Marie had done to her family, to her father and Reza, to her, what she had almost done to Los Angeles, and millions. "Are you headed home?"

"Yeah, thought I might get a shower in before I go to lunch. But if you'd like, I could cancel, and we could stay here… together."

Kate could tell that he was trying to be mock-seductive, but she could also tell that there was no real feeling behind his words. She knew hat it wasn't her. It was him, he's emotional shortcomings, his pain and anguish after Teri's death. "No, it's okay."

Jack stood, but he kept his strong, intelligent eyes on her. "But do you want me to?"

Kate looked back at him. "Yes."

"Then I will." Jack said with a smile, leaning across the table. Kate looked up, and the two kissed, tenderly, passionately…

* * *

Kate had never hated herself more than she did at that moment. It was late in the afternoon, and Jack had finally gone home, to get changed before taking her to dinner. She had turned on the television, to discover that Marie had been convicted of the double murder of Reza Naiyeer and a CTU agent named Richards. She had been sentenced to life in prison, though she had not been convicted on the terrorism charges.

She had turned off the television, after seeing a shot of her sister, looking the same as she had nine months earlier when Kate had seen her last, locked in a CTU containment cell, exhausted and in pain, and hearing a snippet of a speech by President Palmer.

He had been looking almost as strong as he had before the attempt on his life.

"_Today_," he had begun, "_today we have seen the incarceration of another of the terrorists behind the events of nine months ago. I promised you that I would present to you all the facts behind those events, and today, we have taken another step towards full disclosure._"

At that point, Kate had turned the television off, and rolled over, burying her head in her pillow, and began to cry.

She felt as though the only good thing to happen to her over the last nine months was Jack, but she knew that, despite his best efforts, Jack's heart would never be over his wife. He and Teri were the perfect people for each other, no matter the trouble, and her death had broken his heart.

She sighed, and reached for the phone by the side of her bed. She hesitated, tears still streaming from her red, tired eyes. She began to dial, slowly. Finally, she had input Jack's cell number. She put the receiver against her ear, and waited for Jack answer.

After the third ring, he did.

"_Hey_."

"Hi, Jack," Kate said, holding back a sob. "I just wanted to ask you about dinner."

"_Yeah, I was just on my way out the door to pick you up. Are you alright?_" She detected concern and warmth in his voice, but to her it still seemed stale and forced. "_What's wrong?_"

"Jack…" she trailed off, worried about how he would respond.

"_What is it?_"

"I want to know about your family, Jack. I want to know about Teri, about what you went through before we met. I want to know about where you grew up, about your parents, and your brother. I want to know about you." Kate whispered hurriedly, trying to poor her heart out down a phone line.

"_Kate…_" Jack responded, letting his word hang in the air. "_Kate, I care about you. Deeply. But…_" He trailed off, said nothing more.

"But you don't trust me."

"_No, Kate, I trust you, of course I do…_"

Kate said nothing. "I'm sorry Jack, I can't come to dinner tonight."

"_Kate, please…_"

"No, Jack. I'll call you some time." Kate hung up. She rolled back over, towards the television, and began to cry, openly, unendingly, tears streaming down her cheeks, staining her pillow.

The phone started to ring.

She rolled back over, and checked the caller I.D. It was Jack. She leant around behind the phone, and pulled the cord out of the wall. The phone went dead immediately, and the ringing stopped.

Once again, she rolled onto her side, and she continued to cry, thinking of her sister, her father, her long dead mother, and the man she had been almost prepared to love.

* * *

Across town, Jack sat in his car; trying to get through to the woman he had almost been prepared to love. He was nowhere near his house. He had gone home, he had gotten changed, and he had made a reservation at a restaurant for dinner. But he hadn't been just about to leave as he had told Kate. He had left long before.

And so he sat, up the road from huge, beachfront Malibu mansions, watching another woman he had almost allowed himself to love.

That woman, a dark-haired beauty, was playing on the front lawn with a blonde-haired little boy that reminded him so much of Kim. For a moment, he saw himself, with Teri, playing happily with Kim, in his mind a six-year-old, full of happiness and light, the exact opposite to his professional life.

He felt a single tear slide down his cheek, finding himself longing to be with the two people who made him happiest…. But it wasn't who he had thought.

There was Kim.

Since that day, nine months before, they had reconnected.

But the second was not Teri, as he would have thought. No, it was Kate. And still, he knew he would never love her, not the way he had loved Teri. But he would try. And if she did ever call again, he would tell her whatever she would want to know.

The dark-haired woman he was watching stood from her crouch above her little boy, and for a fleeting moment, Jack thought they made eye contact. He saw Teri, and saw a slight smile. A slight nod. He found what he was looking for.

Permission, closure? It didn't matter.

He took out his phone, and made a call. Immediately going to voicemail, Jack heard Kate's answering machine message. "Kate," he began, as he heard the tone. "I just have to tell you…I'm sorry. I want to try. I really do. Please, please just call me."

He hung up.

And drove away from the Malibu mansion.

* * *

The dark-haired woman saw the SUV that had been up the street for about ten minutes drive away, and her eyes widened, when she saw the driver.

"Jack?" she whispered.

"What, mommy?"

Marilyn Bauer squatted down, to her son's eye level, smiled warmly, and scooped him up in a strong bear hug. "Nothing, Josh. I just though that I saw an old friend."


End file.
